It's Over?

Yes, it is a question. But my slump may be over. And I have to give all the credit to my students at the recent Quilt Canada workshops.

A few weeks ago I had the pleasure of attending Quilt Canada in St. Catherines, Ontario. This is the annual big deal in Canada, hosted by the Canadian Quilters' Association and put on by a different local organizing committee. It includes the National Juried Show (which had a modern category this year) and 4 days of workshops, on top of the fun things like banquets, merchant malls, and challenges. I had three days of classes, two days being an Improv workshop.

In our small, ridiculously hot classroom we played and played with fabric. When I teach Improv I like to teach a series of basic techniques via blocks. For an audience used to more traditional piecing I find it to be a good foray into the world of Improv. When I get multi-day workshops we then get more time to play.

And oh, did the ladies in this class play. They all embraced improv with open hearts and sharp rotary cutters. As we taped blocks to the wall, brainstormed possibilities, drew out more and more inspiration, and laughed a lot the excitement grew. I was completely caught up in the energy and inspiration. I'm not going to lie, I may have even jumped up and down a little.

At the end of it I was desperate to sew myself. But I had to rush off on a plane to be home for The Monster's 8th birthday. So I found some time in the following week to play. And when I did play I felt all the same excitement in my own little basement studio that I felt in that room. I felt grounded, I felt energized, I felt creative again.

Thank-you so much ladies, I owe you so much.

Here is what I played with. In the class we covered how to take an idea, and image, and translate it into an improv pieced block. Houses, letters, numbers, mountains, diamonds, they all came out that day. We also brainstormed other shapes and one of them happened to be a sewing machine. That idea planted itself into my head.

I think I may turn this into a full pattern as my mind is spinning with possibilities. And if it wasn't the last day of school I could tell you for sure that I would be sewing more of these every day. Yup, the slump just may be over.

Sewing Room Injuries

No, things have not been that stressful in life that I felt the need for drastic action. It sure looks like it though. I just accidentally touched my arm on the iron last week. This latest burn is healing nicely. It criss crosses a previous burn. And goes nicely with the other two scars on my arm from the same type of injury. Quilting is a dangerous activity!

It is dangerous indeed. We use sharp tools all the time. Hot tools too. All while creating something soft, cuddly, and beautiful. Here are some of my quilting injuries:

... Burns, as described above.
... Dropped a ruler and caught it with the top of my hand, where it landed on the corner and dented my hand nicely.
... Sewn my fingertip to appliqué (just a flesh wound, but a dramatic look).
... Sliced off the tip of pointer finger with the rotary cutter. Pay attention when cutting and don't look away because someone called your name from the top of the stairs. Or else you might almost require a skin graft, if it wasn't for having a brother who is a doctor who can bandage you up properly. And it is nice to be able to keep cutting and do simple things like flick on a light switch with that finger.

What about you? What are your sewing room injuries?

Slump

Wandering aimlessly and picking bits of thread of my shirt...

Moving, sorting, and removing piles of fabric...

Taking out old projects to fondle but then putting them away...

Packing up quilts to put in the cupboard because I don't need to see twenty of them laying around...

Blank sketchbooks...

Being way too interested in my daughter's Rainbow Loom...

Procrastinating on promised gifts and volunteer commitments...

Letting the clutter accumulate...

There isn't much sewing going on, other than the mindless nature of my hand sewing. Definitely no starting of anything. I am the major league hitter with a mid season slump.

Finishing the manuscript, I'm sure, has a lot to do with it. With the previous two books I had something to jump into as soon as it was done - like a new baby or the next book itself. So there wasn't any time to decompress or wallow. Just boom! And on to the next thing. Right now there is no next thing.

I've also had to make the very tough decision to back off teaching for a while. I'm still teaching, but I will not be travelling much for it in the next year or so. It was about to take off in a very good way, but that professional success came with personal sacrifices I wasn't quite willing to make. It is absolutely the right decision, but that doesn't make it easy to live with. I LOVE teaching and the travelling and meeting people... I will miss it for sure but am thankful for the local opportunities coming up.

Without a doubt the state of our house is getting me down. Personally, I can't stand clutter. But I live with 4 people who aren't bothered by it at all. They love me, but they can't quite get themselves to tidy up enough. I can nag more, but that won't do any of us any good. I stay on top of it as best I can, but the bitterness grows and the frustration peaks. Then, when I do buckle down for a good clean up I get cranky because I touch the broken cabinets, the tuck tape never coming off the wall, the unfinished bathrooms, the carpet remnants laying around. I try to keep my studio clean so that can be just my refuge. But still.

It used to never bother me that I have so many UFOs/WIPs, but that might be the problem. That is a form of clutter, after all. So I've got two quilt backs now made so those tops can go to a long armer. And I've puttered with a few of the projects to see if that helps. Fine and a little bit fun, good to keep the muscles moving. They aren't getting me super excited though. At some point I should get a bit more motivated and sort through them all while taking a good hard look in the mirror. What is going to get done and what is not? Then move on.

Regardless of the reasons, I'm itching to find my mojo again. 

A bit of it came back over the weekend. We took a gorgeous drive to a beautiful spot to spend the weekend with precious loved ones. I flipped through trashy magazines, stomped in the forest, taught the girls how to canoe, ate a lot of cheese, and obsessed over pregnant elks. Somewhere in there an idea for another book emerged. It was so invigorating to have that creativity spurt forth. And to know that I was still receptive to new ideas.

You see, I believe that we have to exercise our creative muscles and put the work in to keep us going, but that is no guarantee of creativity. It only makes sure we've left the doors and windows open for the butterflies. But if your butt isn't in the seat doing the work, the beautiful creatures will pass right by without you noticing. Creating isn't inspiration, it's work.

In this slump, however, I have been literally slumped over. Head down, moping, shoulders hunched, and eyes closed to the world. My muscles are working, no doubt about that, but I am not open to the space and forces around me. It's just too internal.

In the past I find that pushing myself for charity work is the way to opening up. It gets me out of myself. Thinking and doing for others. Right now I am still doing that though, as I try to wrap up the last Just One Slab quilts. Confession: even these feel like they are dragging me down right now. But I keep plugging away because they are more important than any of my own sluggishness.

It won't last forever, that I know. Sometime soon I will have something to show you. Even just voicing all this seems to be pulling my shoulders back. I've also identified a short list of my own suggestions for getting through.

- Keep sewing. Keep your muscles moving, your brain activated to the process.

- Finish something, anything.

- Take inventory of the WIPs, admit that you won't finish some and pass them on.

- Wash the windows, or get them washed. New light, clean light will highlight the path and let the butterflies in.

- Try a new technique.

- Give away a quilt, a finished quilt.

- Say no to a commitment.

- Get up early to sip tea and do nothing in the quiet morning light.

- Colour, paint, or create with your kids.

- Turn off the computer, walk away from Pinterest and Instagram

- Put away the inspirational stack of fabric you pulled out two years ago. 

- Sign up for a swap or bee.

- Take a road trip, even if just for the day.

- Have faith in yourself.

Do you have any other suggestions of your own to share?

For now I am enjoying my quiet mornings, even if they aren't all that productive. I'm working on a quilt that is a gift (I'll share when I'm done). I'm prepping for a round of teaching gigs and a family trip to Toronto. And I'm writing a proposal for a book I can't start for at least 6 months, but I've got to run with what is getting me excited. Summer is starting soon - the emerging blossoms (such a late spring) and energy of the kids is indeed invigorating. Today, today I will stand up a little straighter and keep my eyes open for butterflies.

Being Present

It must be said, I cannot do it all.

Writing books and articles, quilting, patterns, and teaching. Mothering, being a wife, a daughter, a sister, a friend. Cooking and cleaning. Being here. I cannot do it all. Something, somewhere, always falls to the side in a heap of lack of time or enthusiasm. 

Thankfully I have kids who don't see the mess that I do, who beg to go out for steak even when I do want to cook, and who patiently model for me. Thankfully I have a babysitter willing to put in extra hours and friends who will pour me tea when they see my shoulders hovering somewhere over my ears. And family who send texts and understand why I haven't called. And dear readers here who send notes because I haven't blogged in weeks.

The last few weeks have been a blur of a photo shoot for the latest book, then finishing all the details for that book. There were family visits and trips to the ER, movie nights and snuggles, afternoons enjoying the sun then evenings watching the snow. I had to work and sneak in living my life. Laundry optional.

But the manuscript is in, the photo shoot done, the bathrooms cleaned, and some brisket in the oven. So I can sew for fun again and laugh with the kids over bad knock knock jokes. I can sit down with my husband at the end of the day instead of burrowing into the studio. I can catch up with the world.

Speaking of the photo shoot for the book...

Kate Inglis came out to shoot this book as well. It is an insane collaboration that I am proud to be a part of. She shot A Month of Sundays too. We hit the ground and five days later it feels like we surface into regular light and reality. And along the way we shoot. Well, she shoots the things I tell her too and she translates my obscure thoughts into gorgeous images, capturing the light and the quilts in a way I didn't imagine. In between we eat and drive and talk and fall into dreams.

Now she is home, celebrating her own book, Flight of the Griffons. The universe may explode from her creative powers. 

And I am home, here. Quietly being who I am.